Nappy Weaves and Corporate Thieves
I've seen two surprisingly interesting documentaries recently, and they both deserve an endorsement here for entirely different reasons.
Good Hair, a Chris Rock doc-omedy about African American hair culture will appeal to a very narrow audience, basically: Black women, black gay men, and parents of black children (are you listening Sandy and Angelina?) Anyone who falls outside of these three demographics will not get Good Hair, as proven by an inebriated Lex who stumbled home with his newest conquest just in time to belch, "what the f**k are you two watching?!?" (This blog would not be complete without mentioning that Lex's late night "friend" not only had the porntastic moniker "Bobbi Beach" but she also fell flat on her face with a loud crash while attempting to go pee, and then tried to blame it on "throwing her purse in the bathtub"... sending T-Relly and I into a fit of unbridled laughter).
It was difficult to continue watching Good Hair during the hot mess unfolding around us, but T and I persevered through the hilarious ending culminating in the over-the-top "Hair Battle" at the famous Bronner Brothers Atlanta Hair Show. Not entirely a comedy, Rock's deadpan delivery perfectly complements a subject matter that weighs heavily in the African American community. Hair relaxer (aka "creamy crack") has a larger financial/cultural chokehold on black women than Apple Bottom jeans and boots with the fuuurrr, and despite being a toxic form of sodium hydroxide, black mothers slather it on their 5 year-old daughter's scalps in hopes of a perfectly straightened coif.
There is definitely a message in this movie – Rock touches on cultural beauty ideals and the raping of an industry by foreign interests – but the majority of it will go over most of TWL reader's soft silky heads.
In contrast, everyone uses water, and everyone should be absolutely required to sit down and watch Tapped. It's going to be difficult for me to write a humorous blog here, because quite frankly, Tapped scared the s**t out of me.
Bottled water is quite possibly the world's greatest scam since Odowan Okon of Nigeria promised to send me my lottery winnings for a simple advance fee of $500. Since 1985, Nestle, PepsiCo, and Coca-Cola have been bottling up a commodity that all of us can get for free and putting it in a snazzy, "healthy," plastic bottle at a 1600% mark-up. Aquafina and Dasani brand water are literally taken from municipal water sources (i.e.: tap water) and rebottled for convenience. And what price are we paying for that convenience? Two massive trash patches twice the size of Texas hovering in the Pacific Ocean, and twenty-five years of poisoning our children with bisphenol A (BPA), a molecule found in plastic is related to: "obesity, prostate cancer, breast cancer, diabetes, liver disease, ovarian disease, disease of the uterus, and low sperm count in males. (I'm seriously considering force-feeding bottled water to all the men in Twin's condom blog so they will stop reproducing!)
The "holy s**t" moment of this film really hit home for me when they showed a beach from one of the most Southern islands of Hawaii where the sand and coral has been completely replaced by tiny plastic particles. Less than 30% of all water bottles are recycled, and soo many end up as trash in our oceans that plastic levels were found to be 46% higher than plankton levels near the Pacific trash patches.
I know many of you are not on the eco-band wagon, and are probably scrolling to the "boring" check box as we speak, but let me appeal to your vanity for a moment and tell you a little secret …. 40% of all bottled water is drawn from municipal water sources … So that cool little bottle of $1.99 Voss you are chugging down right now is telling us all, "You are a sucker!"
I know. I was one too.